The other day, I watched my wife begin a knitting project with a brand-new ball of yarn. She pulled a strand from the center, ready to start, but instead of a smooth, continuous length of yarn, out came a tangled mess. Frustrated, she held up the chaotic knot, and I suggested a simple solution: “Why not cut the yarn just past the knot and start fresh?” She shook her head and explained that doing so would waste too much yarn. She refused to give up on what looked like a problem, no matter how frustrating it was.
What followed became a powerful lesson in leadership. I watched her work with that tangled yarn, carefully pulling on strands from both ends of the knot to see where it was tightest. It was a slow, methodical process that required patience and persistence—qualities every leader knows are essential. I asked her what she was doing, and her response was simple and profound. “I’m figuring out where the problem is,” she said. “If you just yank it or cut it out, you waste valuable yarn, and the knot can actually get worse. But if you work with it, you can usually get it all untangled.”
Here was the perfect metaphor for a leadership lesson. Leaders are constantly handed “tangled messes”—problems that require skill, patience, and determination to untangle without creating even bigger issues. Cutting through the knot may seem like a quick solution, but it often sacrifices something valuable, whether that’s time, resources, or relationships. Let’s take a deeper look at how a simple ball of yarn can provide insight into effective leadership strategies and why patience, problem-solving, and perspective matter so much.
1. Identifying the core problem before taking action
In our work, it’s tempting to jump straight to solutions when we encounter a problem, especially if it’s a knotty one. However, leadership demands that we understand the true nature of a challenge before trying to fix it. When faced with the knotted yarn, my wife’s instinct was not to cut it out but to see where it was most tangled. She assessed the core of the problem before taking action.
In leadership, identifying the root cause of a problem is often the first and most crucial step. Rushing to a quick fix—such as implementing a broad-stroke solution or moving people around without fully understanding the issues—can lead to deeper challenges down the road. Thoughtful leaders take time to examine all aspects of a situation, allowing them to identify underlying issues and address them effectively. This approach not only resolves the immediate problem but also prevents similar issues from cropping up in the future.
2. Embracing patience as a powerful tool
Patience is an underrated but essential quality in leadership. Working through a knotted mess requires a steady hand and a calm mind, and the same goes for solving complex problems at work. Rushed solutions often lead to unforeseen consequences, which can be even harder to resolve. My wife’s refusal to cut the yarn demonstrated her willingness to exercise patience, valuing the yarn too much to take the easy way out.
In leadership, patience allows us to look at situations from all angles and develop a comprehensive approach. A hasty response may patch things up momentarily, but a patient leader takes the time to think things through, listen to various perspectives, and create a solution that holds long-term. Just as my wife carefully examined the knot, a patient leader understands that the time invested in addressing a problem thoroughly often pays off far more than quick, impulsive action.
3. Learning to see both ends of the knot
Another critical insight from the yarn experience was the importance of seeing “both ends” of a problem. As my wife carefully worked the knot, she pulled on both ends to get a complete view. This allowed her to assess the tension and understand where the knot was tightest.
In leadership, seeing all sides of a situation is vital. Effective leaders take the time to understand the perspectives of their team members, stakeholders, and customers. They gather insights from all angles to better understand the issue and what’s at stake. This holistic view helps leaders make informed decisions that consider the broader effect of their actions.
4. Avoiding the “Cut it and move on” mentality
When I first suggested simply cutting the yarn, it was an attempt to save time. And let’s face it—this can be a common temptation in leadership. When faced with a tough problem, a quick fix may seem like the best option. However, quick fixes often create a bigger mess down the line. They may provide temporary relief but at the cost of long-term issues, whether in team morale, operational efficiency, or company culture.
My wife’s response was to reject the “cut it and move on” approach because she knew it would cost her in the long run. Effective leaders understand that some problems can’t be cut away without sacrificing valuable resources. Instead, they take the time to work through the mess, recognizing that some challenges are worth the extra effort because of what’s at stake.
5. Building resilience through tenacity
Watching my wife work through that knot, I couldn’t help but notice her tenacity. She was determined to untangle the yarn, no matter how frustrating or time-consuming it was. This tenacity—the refusal to give up or take the easy way out—is another valuable trait in leadership.
Leaders often face setbacks, obstacles, and unexpected challenges. It’s easy to feel discouraged or tempted to abandon the effort, but true leadership requires resilience. Tenacious leaders push through these challenges, using setbacks as learning opportunities and strengthening their resolve. Tenacity isn’t just about enduring difficulty; it’s about seeing a challenge through to the end with confidence and dedication. My wife’s determination to untangle the knot, rather than give up or take shortcuts, reflects the mindset of a resilient leader.
6. The value of mindful problem-solving
Mindful problem-solving is about being fully present and engaged in the process of finding solutions. My wife’s approach to the tangled yarn demonstrated mindfulness: she didn’t rush, instead, she worked carefully and thoughtfully. In leadership, mindfulness helps us to be more intentional, fully considering our actions and their potential impact.
Mindful leaders cultivate focus and presence, allowing them to make more thoughtful and effective decisions. They prioritize the quality of their work over the speed of completion, and this often leads to better outcomes. By applying mindfulness to problem-solving, leaders can develop solutions that are sustainable, impactful, and beneficial to everyone involved.
7. Seeing the bigger picture and valuing resources
Finally, my wife’s refusal to waste yarn, despite the difficulty it presented, illustrated the importance of valuing resources. Leaders are entrusted with resources—whether that’s people, time, money, or materials. Effective leaders recognize that every resource is valuable and avoid wasteful or dismissive decisions.
By carefully untangling the knot rather than discarding a portion of the yarn, my wife demonstrated a commitment to making the most of what she had. In leadership, this mindset translates to making decisions that optimize resources and avoid unnecessary losses. It reflects a respect for what’s available and a commitment to using resources wisely.
Conclusion: The leadership lessons of a ball of yarn
Who knew a simple ball of yarn could provide so much insight into leadership? Watching my wife patiently work through a tangled mess reminded me that effective leadership requires a steady hand, a patient heart, and a willingness to work through challenges thoughtfully. It’s easy to get frustrated and take shortcuts when things get difficult, but true leadership requires tenacity and resilience.
In today’s fast-paced world, it’s tempting to opt for quick solutions, to cut the knot and move on. But strong leaders recognize the value in untangling the mess—seeing all ends, working through it with patience, and preserving what’s valuable. Whether it’s a ball of yarn or a complex project, the lesson remains the same: leadership is about understanding, patience, and the determination to work through challenges without sacrificing what truly matters.
Exercise | Deliberate practice
When faced with a wadded-up mess, instead of simply cutting out the mess, stop to look at both sides of the challenge.
In leadership, seeing all sides of a situation is vital. Effective leaders take the time to understand the perspectives of their team members, stakeholders, and customers. They gather insights from all angles to better understand the issue and what’s at stake. This holistic view helps leaders make informed decisions that consider the broader effects of their actions.
Leaders often face setbacks, obstacles, and unexpected challenges. It’s easy to feel discouraged or tempted to abandon the effort, but true leadership requires resilience. Tenacious leaders push through these challenges, using setbacks as learning opportunities and strengthening their resolve. Tenacity isn’t just about enduring difficulty; it’s about seeing a challenge through to the end with confidence and dedication.
When faced with a complex tangled ball of yarn, pause to consider it from every angle, just as you would examine both sides of a tangled knot before deciding how to unravel it.
- Identify the Challenge: Choose a current issue within your team or organization that feels particularly complex or messy.
- Gather Perspectives: Write down how this issue might look from the viewpoints of your team members, customers, and other stakeholders. Imagine their concerns, needs, and possible solutions.
- List Potential Impacts: Consider the broader impact each potential solution might have on people, processes, and outcomes.
- Reflect on Resilience: Identify any parts of the challenge that discourage you. How can you use these feelings to fuel your determination? Reflect on ways to stay focused and committed as you work through the solution.
By seeing a challenge from all sides, you’ll develop a more balanced, resilient approach to decision-making
Don’t wait for tomorrow, tomorrow never comes. What you have is today and this is the best time to begin anything.
